I started knitting a new cardigan last night and realised that I needed a 3.5mm needle. As is always the case, I couldn't find the one set of needles that I needed so today while we were out, I thought we would nip into a new yarn shop, since we were passing the front door and I wanted to get home and carry on with the knitting tonight.
We walked in and I noticed that there was a knitting group all sitting around the table, having a great time. While the majority of the yarn was really cheap acrylic, there was some nicer yarn and I had spotted a lovely shade of King Cole Riot that I hadn't seen before and was tempted to buy for J to make him a new hat. They also had this crazy yarn which looked interesting for making bags and quick cushion covers with big needles. Anyway, I was being good, all I needed were needles so off I went to buy some, only to find that they had every size other than 3.5mm except for in sets with needle rolls and we all know, I'm not short of a few needle rolls so I asked the owner and that is where the 'fun' started:
Me > 'Hi, do you sell any 3.5mm needles please?'
Owner > 'They don't exist'
Me > 'Ah. I've used them before, I just can't find mine now that I need them'
Owner > 'No, they don't make them.'
Cue the gaggle of knitters talking very loudly amongst themselves about the 'silly girl' who wanted a 3.5mm knitting needle. 'Well Nora, I've never used one in all the years I have knitted. Honestly these young knitters, they think they know everything' Owner and her groupies spend a bit of time talking amongst themselves about how I am asking for something akin to the moon on a stick.
At this point I would normally have abandoned it as a bad job but I wanted to go home and knit tonight and I knew these needles existed, especially since they were selling them in a kit and being made to feel like a fool by about ten people was really quite infuriating so I continued....
Me > 'Well you sell them down there in sets so they clearly exist but I only want the 3.5mm, not the whole set'
Owner > 'There is no such thing as a 3.5mm needle. Those are just really special ones (she spoke slowly to me here because clearly I was a mad girl who hadn't got a clue what I was talking about) called double pointed but you wouldn't want those'
Me > 'Yes, I can see the dpns but what about these ?' (picking up the straight 3.5mm needles out of the set, working really hard not to stab any of her knitting club members who were still talking about how stupid I was)
Owner > 'Ahh well yes, we sell those. Maybe we have some of them.' She squeezes past Doris to get a box out of a cupboard and low and behold she finds.......a box of 3.5mm needles..you know, the size of needle that doesn't exist!
Me > 'Oh yes, just what I want. Can I have a pair of those please?'
Now the knitting club women are virtually picking themselves up off the floor because Doris, these needles don't exist. In all of these years I have never needed one so why would anyone else need one?
I paid, declined the offer a bag from the shop because I'd rather not advertise their fantastic shop as I walked back to the car and left. Vowing never to step foot in the shop again.
Thank you very much Mrs Yarn Shop Owner. At least your shop is one place I won't be spending my money....and you all want to see the non-existant needles?